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what you do and then seek them out. Most people I know can
do this. It is the next part they have trouble with you have
to ask them! There is a skill to getting to yes, but most of you
will never develop the courage to ask in the first place, so I will
discuss this first. My two-year-old has no problem asking for
what he wants. I remember when I was a child, I also didn t
have any problem asking for what I wanted, and if I didn t get
the answer I was looking for, I would find another way to ask.
I would keep asking until I got what I wanted. As we become
adults, we become more self-sufficient and forget to ask for help
with what we would like to achieve. We think we can figure it
out for ourselves. While this may be true, it would be so much
faster and easier to ask those who already know. Somewhere
along the line, we become afraid of the word no. So rather than
being rejected, we would rather just not ask at all. The thing
to remember is what if the answer had been yes? Guess you ll
never know if you do not ask in the first place.
So how do you get to the yes answer? The one thing you don t
want to do is come out of the blue and ask for help with no
regard for what your potential mentor does or the time he has.
Do some research first. If you re seeking business advice from
a company president, take the time to find some background
information. Visit his or her store or Web site, talk to other
employees, see if you can find any media information. Find
everything you can and review it all. During this process you
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Under the Bar
may find what you re looking for and not need to contact the
president at all. Then again, you may find out that this is not
the right company for you. Lastly, you may discover that you ll
need to contact the president for more information. The next
thing to do is to become a customer. When I have suggested
this in the past, many people have asked me how this will make
a difference. This matters for two reasons: First, the best way to
really know a company is to do business with them. Second, I
can almost guarantee that whoever you re trying to speak with
will look you up in their database to see if you ve supported
their company in the past. This may not make a difference in
all cases, but it sure can t hurt you any.
Coworkers Team Members
At some point in time we all have to work with others to
get a job done. You don t have to like the people you work
with, but you still have to get the job done. As stated with
the earlier bench press example, you re only as strong as your
weakest link.
I have been a part of Westside Barbell Club for many years,
and while powerlifting is an individual sport, Westside is not.
For many years Westside has produced some of the strongest
powerlifters in the world. These lifters do not see themselves as
being any better than any of the other lifters in the club. Chuck
Vogelpohl is a great example of this. Chuck is a great lifter,
having squatted more than 1,000 pounds in the 220-pound
weight class and was the 2004 WPO middleweight champion
at the Arnold Classic. Chuck is known throughout the pow-
erlifting world for his intense desire to be the best. What the
powerlifting world does not know is how far he will go out of
his way to help the lesser-known lifters in the club. He knows
that Westside is only as strong as the weakest lifter, and that
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when Westside gets better, he gets better. I ve known Chuck for
many years, and I also know there have been several lifters in
the club he may have not liked for various reasons, but this has
never stopped him from helping them get better. It makes little
difference if you don t like someone on your team you are all
after the same thing, and there is more power in the team than
there is in any individual.
Your Self
What if you are the problem? What if you are the one holding
the team back? What if you are holding yourself back?
Have you ever thought of this? Well, you should. Do you treat
others the way you would like to be treated? Do you take the
time to help your team get better? Are you a good husband or
wife? Are you a good parent? How about a good friend? Do you
take the time to help others who ask? Could you help make a
difference in someone s life? Are you a part of someone s net-
work? If you are not any of these things, then you must take a
good look in the mirror and ask yourself: What do I need to
change about myself right now to build better relationships?
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Chapter Six
Criticism
Do what you feel in your heart is right,
for you will be criticized anyway.
Eleanor Roosevelt
Criticism is prejudice made plausible.
H.L. Mencken
To avoid criticism, do nothing,
say nothing, and be nothing.
Elbert Hubbard
In criticism I will be bold, and as sternly,
absolutely just with a friend or foe.
From this purpose nothing shall turn me.
Edgar Allan Poe
You can t operate a company by fear,
because the way to eliminate fear is to avoid criticism.
And the way to avoid criticism is to do nothing.
Steve Ross
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I much prefer the sharpest criticism
of a single intelligent man to the
thoughtless approval of the masses.
Johann Kepler
A critic is a man who knows the way
but can t drive the car.
Kenneth Tynan
Reviewers are usually people who would
have been poets, historians, biographers, if they could.
They have tried their talents at one thing or another
and have failed; therefore they turn critic.
Samuel Taylor Coleridge
If they could, they would;
since they can t, they rant.
David Tate
It behooves every man to remember that the work
of the critic is of altogether secondary importance,
and that, in the end, progress is accomplished
by the man who does things.
Theodore Roosevelt
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Criticism (as defined by the American Heritage Dictionary):
1. The art of criticizing, especially adversely.
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